The Intelligence to heal & grow is inside us, ALL of us, & we can be open and receptive to allowing it anytime.
This is true for our children.
This is true for us.
To exist in a state we call ‘open’, our nervous system must be soothed enough to allow the state of playfulness & curiosity that leads us into vision, expansion, & growth.
There may have been significant trauma with the PDAer or other family members - bullying, self harm, families torn apart, financial strain, illness & pain, depression...
Maybe you are reading this feeling you are still in or have been through trauma - as a parent, as a family, or more generally because of your connection to someone with PDA.
Even ‘smaller’ feelings of hurt, anger & fear can keep us stuck in patterns that keep us apart from all that we really are and in continuous fight, fight, freeze, or fawn mode.
That’s OK!
With all the love and wishing in the world we can’t undo what we chose when we didn’t know better.
I speak to many parents who feel stuck in their anxiety, in their grief, in their sadness, in their anger, in their overwhelm, in their hopelessness.
Owning up to experiencing trauma through your parenting experience so far is no reflection on your child, nor your feelings towards them, anymore than birth trauma is a reflection on a new mother’s baby!
The ripple effects of a PDA child living in anxiety & distress because of being misunderstood and unsupported are enormous for the whole family.
You know the conditioned ‘Mum brain’ that tells you there is laundry to fold, there are calls to make, food to prep, birthday presents to wrap, online shopping to do, blogs to write ;) etc...?
Much more so than MAKING it simple, could we choose to ALLOW it be simple?
Or, at least simpler & easier one moment at a time?
The thoughts we think, the beliefs we hold, what we take in from others (books, professionals, family) & even how we’ve experienced things the last year, or the last week ALL shape the experience we are having with parenting our children today
